A Miserable Steven Seagal And Richard Dean Anderson Christen All New Class Of Geek Squad Protection [Under Siege 3: Hot Lights]
newVideoPlayer("/macss_def.flv", 506, 423,"");To roll out their all-new level of Black Tie Geek Squad Protection (the geeks arrive in stretch limousines, carry silver trays, and are all named Giles), Best Buy enlisted the celebrity services of "Four Icons of Protection, Steven Seagal, Richard Dean Anderson and Tanya Roberts," according to the press release. (That's just three, but who's counting?) Our Zune-taunting cousins at Gizmodo were there to catch all the excitement. Sadly, despite the best efforts of

Two juicy blind items today
This tough guy actor loves playing a hero. His successful movies are violent and loaded with explosive action. He’s always been a macho bruiser so romantic scenes are scarce and that’s fine with him. He dates pretty women when he’s in the US, but he prefers to make movies that film in Europe. That’s because he feels he has more privacy there. He can do what he wants without being observed and what he wants to do is go to gay bars and pick up men. His girlfriends back in the US wish h

"Who's Sarah Palin?"
During a 9.16 promotional visit to a Manhattan Best Buy store, Steven Seagal spoke to MTVs Josh Horowitz and revealed the state of his political awareness. Many people go through life tuning stuff out, but Seagal's admission is amazing. Now He's Excited?

One Of These Geeks Is Not Like The Other
Take a good hard look at the following photo of some local Best Buy Geek Squad employees, and see if you can spot the one thing that is not like the other: Answer ahead…. It’s Steven Seagal with Geek Squad Agents at a New York City Best Buy yesterday to launch Geek Squad Black Tie Protection. And let’s face it: Steven Seagal would totally steal all your porn. Posted on 09/17/08 5:46pm | Permalink | Categories:

Xander Cage’s “Death Scene” from xXx…
There’s good news and bad news for action heroes — the good news is that, when their star begins to fade just a little bit (or in the case of Seagal and Van Damme, gets snuffed out by the cruelties of life and, in Seagal’s case, bags and bags of Cheetos), they can always return to the roles that made them famous. The bad news? Well, they’re going backwards, not forward, and you can only do that for so long until even your diehard fans start to think, “Wow, maybe my time could b

Mayhem reigns in Toronto's "Midnight Madness" films (Reuters)
Reuters - Forget red carpets and polite Hollywood stars. Mayhem reigns at the Toronto film festival's "Midnight Madness" movies that kicked off, literally, with an early Friday morning screening of "JCVD" in which aging action hero Jean-Claude Van Damme pokes fun at his own career.

The /Filmcast: After Dark Ep. 17 (GUESTS: Eric D. Snider and Alex Billington)
The /Filmcast: After Dark is a recording of what happens right after The /Filmcast is over, when the kids have gone to bed and the guys feel free to speak whatever is on their minds. In other words, it’s the leftover and disorganized ramblings, mindfarts, and brain diarrhea from The /Filmcast, all in one convenient audio file. In this episode, Dave, Devindra, and Adam chat with Peter Sciretta and Alex Billington about their film festival travels (including a run-in with an irate Harvey Weinstein), assess

Should Jean-Claude Van Damme Start Writing His Oscar Speech? [French Twist]
Though the French have a knack for embracing the most embarrassing elements of American culture, not even Jerry Lewis could have prepared us for JCVD, the shockingly acclaimed Cannes sensation featuring washed-up action star Jean-Claude Van Damme. A postmodern drama that stars the Muscles from Brussels as himself, we've brought you the awkward teaser trailer (wherein Van Damme stumbles upon a JCVD casting call, then argues for a more believable character motivation: cocaine) and now we're happy to announce

Scott Adkins is … Ninja
Scott Adkins is a British actor who has been languishing in B-movie hell for a while now, slowly but surely climbing his way up the action movie food chain. His biggest role to date was a part in “The Bourne Ultimatum”, but he should get a major boost with the upcoming “X-Men Origins: Wolverine”, in which he has a pretty decent sized part. But before those two movies, Adkins had to play second fiddle to the likes of Van Damme and Michael Jai White. Yes. Friggin Michael Jai White. B

NEWS AND NOTES ON WRESTLEMANIA, JOHN CENA, BROCK LESNAR, AND ROB VAN DAM
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Andrew Breitbart: Drudge's Human Face [Influentials]
Finally, a place where Hollywood conservatives can have their say. Andrew Breitbart, the friendly half of the Drudge Report link machine, is about to launch what we can only describe as "Sort of the conservative mirror of the original idea for Huffington Post, the one what was quickly abandoned." His new venture will supposedly become a destination site for Hollywood conservatives (like Jean-Claude Van Damme!) to speak out, and have their musing published on the World Wide Web. And, you know, good luck with

JCVD Review (TIFF ‘08)
I’m not sure if my enjoyment of JCVD was hurt more by my expectations for the movie, or Jean-Claude Van Damme’s. Directed by Mabrouk El Mechri, JCVD is an intriguing blend of reality and fiction, with Jean-Claude Van Damme playing, well, Jean-Claude Van Damme, an aging action star in the midst of a bitter custody battle and some difficult soul-searching. An attempt by the Muscles from Brussels to revamp his lagging public image and “rebrand” himself as something more than just a dire

Mayhem reigns in Toronto's "Midnight Madness" films - Reuters
Forget red carpets and polite Hollywood stars. Mayhem reigns at the Toronto film festival's "Midnight Madness" movies that kicked off, literally, with an early Friday morning screening of "JCVD" in which aging action hero Jean-Claude Van Damme pokes fun at his own career.

Jean-Claude Van Damme Is Back–and More from Toronto
I was excited to see “JCVD,” billed as an action comedy that stars Jean-Claude Van Damme as himself. Jean-Claude is a washed-up action man facing a bitter child custody dispute and filming a B movie in which (in the film’s best and indeed only good scene) he does a lengthy single take featuring all kinds of crazy cinematic fight cliches and perfectly timed stunts. Then when he goes to the post office to pick up some cash he gets held hostage by a gang of robbers who recognize him and want

Bangkok Dangerous? More like Bangkok Tedious…
Okay, before I tear into this movie, I should mention that I’m actually a pretty big Nicholas Cage fan. But like John Travolta, Nicholas Cage has a lot of die-hard fans and a lot of people who can’t stand him and relatively little in between. But love him or hate him, he’s just not a serious action star, despite constantly starring in action movies. He’s like a slighly more Hollywood-ized version of Jean Claude Van Damme (another of my personal heroes, of course), with slightly less

iW NEWS | Peace Arch Takes "JCVD"
Peace Arch Home Entertainment, LLC has announced that it has acquired all North American distribution rights to director Mabrouk El Mechr's "JCVD." The film, which had its world premiere at Cannes this May and will make its North American debut in Toronto, stars Jean-Claude Van Damme as a self-deprecating version of himself. "'JCVD' is the first significant acquisition of the new venture between Peace Arch and ContentFilm," said Berry Meyerowitz, President of Peace Arch Home Entertainment, in a statement.

Stargate: Continuum (R2) in August
MGM and Fox Home Entertainment have announced the UK Region 2 DVD release of Stargate: Continuum on 18th August 2008 priced at £19.99. In this new feature, members of SG-1 find themselves returning to a world where their history has been dramatically altered. Stargate: Continuum reunites Richard Dean Anderson as Jack O'Neill, with series favourites Ben Browder, Amanda Tapping, Christopher Judge, Claudia Black, Beau Bridges and Michael Shanks as Daniel Jackson. Features are TBC but extras are likely to m

Jean-Claude Van Damme Re-Evaluates Career: 'I Will Never Do Another Movie I Would Not Like'
Shed a tear if you're feeling charitable for Jean-Claude Van Damme. Sure, the one-time nearly A-list action star (perhaps my odd admiration for "Timecop" and "Hard Target" is showing here?) admits he's made a fortune in the last decade thanks to straight-to-DVD movies with titles like "Wake of Death" and "Until Death," but he's not very proud of any of it. When MTV caught up with Van Damme to discuss his latest flick, "The Shepherd: Border Patrol," he was in an introspective mood, admitting he's only ev

Exclusive Clip: 'JCVD'
Filed under: Comedy, Drama, Fandom, Movie Marketing, Fantastic Fest, Toronto International Film Festival, Trailers and Clips Cinematical is very excited to bring you this exclusive clip from the new flick JCVD, which, surprisingly, has watched a tremendous amount of buzz build around it since it first screened at this past Cannes Film Festival. Now, as part of the 2008 Toronto International Film Festival midnight slate (it premieres tonight!), JCVD will receive a more proper introduction (or should I say,

SAXON Films 'Live To Rock' Video
Aestheticom's Bill Schacht, who has previously directed music videos for DIO, KING DIAMOND, AMON AMARTH, FATAL SMILE, LIBERTY X/REV RUN, ZAKK WYLDE and SISTER SIN, among others, has just completed filming footage for the upcoming SAXON clip for the soon-to-be classic rock anthem "Live To Rock". According to SPV, SAXON's follow-up to 2007's "The Inner Sanctum" is scheduled for release in October. Vocalist Biff Byford of SAXON was interviewed at the Graspop Metal Meeting (June 27-29) in Dessel, Belgium by "

W2W: Timecop, Wrestling and Democracy
Van Damme, TNA and politics highlight Thursday TV.

#1465: Universal Soldier
I don’t know how many more complete thoughts my brain can put together after watching this not-so-fine piece of Van Dammage but, here goes the truncated review: Van Damme cannot even play the part of an emotionless reanimated corpse correctly.   Worst. Actor. Ever. Dolph Lundgren is seriously scary. I do NOT want to see Van Damme’s butt ever again…especially that many times in a row. Reanimating dead soldiers and submitting them to mind control so they’ll be perfect soldiers?  

DESTRUCTION: New Audio Interview With SCHMIER Available
Bassist/vocalist Marcel "Schmier" Schirmer of the German thrash veterans DESTRUCTION was interviewed recently by "Whiplash", a weekly metal show on Belgian national radio Studio Brussel, hosted by AFTER ALL guitarist Dries Van Damme. Listen to the chat in streaming audio at this location. "D.E.V.O.L.U.T.I.O.N.", the new album from DESTRUCTION, has entered the Media Control chart in the band's home country at position No. 65. The "D.E.V.O.L.U.T.I.O.N." title track is available for streaming on the band's M

ROB VAN DAM AND HIS WIFE SONYA POST UPDATE ON SONYA'S BATTLE WITH COLON CANCER
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Van Damme mockumentary set for fall release - Reuters
Canadian producer Peace Arch Entertainment has picked up North American rights to the Jean-Claude Van Damme-starring parody "JCVD" ahead of its North American bow at the Toronto International Film Festival.